Wednesday, July 30, 2008

what causes happiness....

So, maybe perhaps because of a intriguing conversation that i was apart of on monday night, in combination with watching (perhaps) my favourite movie of all time, Amelie, on Saturday, I have been somewhat introspective in the last few days.  and, it is late, so i will not dive right into it.

but, pretty much, it goes on the realm of: what is it that causes happiness, or the sense that a day has gone well, or why we wake up some days feeling like shit, or like we can conquer the world, or like the world has conquered us...  or, what makes us feel confident, or inconfident?  what causes us to be introspective, or to analyze, or to just brush it off?   

and no, this is not asking the question "why do we have emotions" or even, "what causes emotions" but maybe more so: "how do we respond to the emotions that we experience?"

how do we give credit, when credit is due?  was it the good or bad weather, or was it a person, or was it physiological, or was it god answering a prayer, or was it just God being God, or was it that you missed a bus and felt rushed for the rest of the day, or was it because you saw someone smile? and, what do we do beyond that? to we analyze *why* we might feel a certain way, or do we just "let it be?"  

other questions that i have thought about in the last two days:
  • what is a christian? (yes, it comes down to faith in christ, through grace.  but, beyond that...?)
  • how is it possible to be distracted by someone, when they are not even around? 
  • is there an answer to homelessness and addiction? and how do we find it?
  • why do i have to wake up at 4:45am tomorrow?

other thoughts that i have had in the last little bit:
  • i think that in studying for my MCAT, i am learning a bit about trust, again.
  • i *love* the movie, Amelie.  I really just don't think that i can watch it enough times in this lifetime.
  • i miss.  and, sometimes that makes me sad.  
  • maybe there are too many things to do in this world.  like climbing kilimanjaro.  or, taking the ferry to alaska.  or biking to central america.  or traveling overland through north africa.  or making it back to jerusalem, to get another ring. or, racing in more triathlons.  or moving to south africa. or helping loved ones find their path in life. or visiting people that you have not seen for a long time.  how do you choose just one or a few?
  • maybe i didnt eat enough of that Dove chocolate, and i gave too much of it to my friends.  but, i definently know that they enjoyed it every time i pulled out a little "purse pack" to give to them.  and, that made me happy....

goodnight, folks.  that is my introspectiveness for now..

ooooo. i just noticed that today, i passed reach 1001 visitors on my site since december.  that is kinda neat.  im good with that number ;) that is approximently 125/month.  5 people a day, or so.  

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